Open Doors

So one door closes and another one opens. We sit we wait, we pray......

So here I sit, asking why, what now? Where am I supposed to be. Afraid to wait to long and miss the opportunity, or keeping waiting for the "right one" to come along.

As I speak of missed opportunities I refer to not only work, but life in general, where are you supposed to be in you relationships, with people and with God? 

 As my week continues to go by I know that time is ticking, decisions must be made. However all I can do at this time is pray and wait.

My health has been good, minor flare ups but that was from over doing it, working too hard, or just plain running. Now I feel that I am getting back on track, start exercising and eating better.

Can't wait to step back on that scale and show him what I have done. Feeling pretty good in that aspect. But still need to deal with the pain. Headaches are back and kicking it up, but I will not be held back any longer from my Life!

So I leave you tonight with this question,  do you know what it is you are seeking? What are we desperately searching for each and every day? Do we already have it?

Take care of You! Good Night God Bless,

Kim

P.S. For those following, still of the Lyrica & Cymbalta- just taking the Plaquenil for immune system

Changes- is it time?

After this past month and all my ups and downs. I have finally hit the breaking point. I am asking God to take over everything in my life.
From my health  career  to kids and family matters 
I am done trying to control it all, I know it's all out of my  hands  and in his...

Now easy to say when tired and sad but in order to get things back to some sort of "Organized Chaos" it's time to let go...

So please pray with me and for me to be strong and patient while waiting for him to show me His way, cause we know mine is not working!!

Hugs and Luv

too soon

No sooner did I post my blog on Saturday but then Sunday it started again. I need some info from my Lupie friends. I can not handle this constant nausea or days with out keeping food down.
Of course I am losing weight really fast, but probably not the bets way to  go about it.
I did make it to work but taking a break when you only have a 4 hour shift kinda stinks.  I need to see if you have other suggestions, tried mint tea, sea bands, ginger ale, and Sprite. I hate to take phenegran (sp) unless it's really bad. I had a patch when I was I surgery but don't know much about it or how often you use it.
Well I am of too bed, feeling really sore today. Guess going back to work is taking it's toll on me as I have been really sore past 2 days. Missed service yesterday :( was so looking forward to hearing Calling Levi.  
Take care, hugs and luvs, and God Bless

Kimberly

Getting Good

Wow, why is it that the days seem to go by so fast when you it's a great weekend to be off and getting things accomplished? I have so much to do but yet time has flown by me today like I was standing still, and we all know I don't stop very often.
Busy week back to work but all and all I feel really good. Ready to start the gym and start Zumba, wanna get my dance on.
got my tan going already.
Stitches are pretty well healed and all on the outside now just waiting for the inside to not be so sore.
I am happy to report that I am still off most of my meds and feeling extremely well. I had planned to wean a little at a time but being sick prompted me to go off both almost cold turkey.
Now I am still taking the meds for the "Lupus" but not all the pain meds, ie Cymbalta & Lyrica also have not been taking the meds for fatigue. I have been surprised at the amount of energy and drive I am feeling lately and I think the more excited I get the more energy I have.
I have to say that today has been pretty fantastic just in general, I feel great about how I am feeling and how things are going to be in the upcoming weeks. I am so ready to get things back on track- I want my old self back. And with the help of being sick, its helping me get Unsick? Maybe feels great to shed a few more pounds too. Now to keep it off..
When you look around at yourself now, what changes do you think about? What would you change if you could?

TIme to run catch later

Be Blessed

Better Days Ahead

So today started out well. I actually woke up on my own about 6:15 or so, not me. I am so  not a morning person so why I keep waking up is far beyond me. But  I like it, I want to start getting up early all the time- it's quiet!
 So I was was awake, just didn't really do much but lay there for a bit and relax. After my coffee and shower, few work calls and herding kids out of bed. I was off to work. My first day back!
It felt good, first meeting fro coffee went well then off to lunch meeting that was even better (family) then headed out in the beautiful 65° weather and hit the streets. Pictures and updates on construction at the New Killeen Subdivision It looks awesome.
  Got a bit of house work done played games with the kids, and had a few visitors. Even sold lots of GS Cookies.
All in all it was a very successful day. I just wanted to thank God that I was well enough to have had such a great day with friends and family . I am a little sore now but I am headed to bed now to sleep it off.

Church  tomorrow and then finish the dreaded clothes I am so far behind on.
Good night loves & hugs


 Kim  :)  

See my new Music player Widget!

The New year

Well so far my new year and all of its aspirations have not taken off so well. As you can tell I have been gone for sometime here.
First my daughter got pretty sick then we went out of town to Revolve Tour - Like Women of Faith for Teen Girls  it was awesome. TO be surrounded by that much love and Chirstitan Faith, to be moved by the songs and the skits. Purley magical i thought, plus Britt Nichole is always so much fun in concert, so is Hawk Nelson.
Then to top it off we got to see hubby that night and the next day. We had a great mini family vaca, not all the kids but it was nice one one one for my son and husband and for me & Maria.
So back home back to work I go, I come home w/ a major headache and I go to bed, for a week w/ the flu. So hubby comes to take care of me. I then drive him back to Texarkana (8 hrs) we have a wonderful trip there and a quiet dinner. Nice us time. The next day I am in excruciating pain go to the ER to find out I have gallstones, and my gallbladder is enraged and need to come out.. So here I am now stuck up here 8 hours away w/ my car and hubby cant leave school to take me home to my own dr. so I get mom to come get me and bring me home and in 2 days I was in same day surgery. Here we are now a week after that and I am recovering pretty well. Just sore like I have been kicked in the chest. But all and all I am doing better. I am looking at this as a positive step to better health.
Maybe some of my symptom are from this bad organ that was living in my body. Maybe my Fibro wont be so bad now, maybe the fatigue and exhaustion will be less.  I am sure that this had allot to do with my down sliding the past few months.
Tomorrow I am thinking of heading to the gym for a bit a walking on treadmill, then maybe some slight stretching and  mild yoga. My diet had been restricted quite a bit this past week so I am trying really hard not to go back to soda and junk food. Easier said then done when home all day I know but hopefully I have the strength to stick with it.
Well that's whats been going on, so I really need to get to work and make some money! I am ready to take on this new subdivision and sell!
Got a few parties booked for my Thirty-one gifts too so that should help off set a few things and take another headache off my plate.
Take care and God Bless Hugs & Luvs ,

  Kim
PS pretty much stopped taking the Cymbalta cold turkey sorta, was to sick so waiting to see if I am good or need to still ween off of it- but only a few pills in about 3 weeks, so far so good!

Wednesday

Not much today, Maria was sick this am so hung around with her this am.
Then off to HS for ticket sales them deliver GS Cookies all over. Exciting we sold 2 cases and anther 3 promised already. So have to get more tomorrow.

MNS seems to help alot feel great now that my weight getting back to normal, great tan And just better emotionally. Hip getting there too.

Eyes watery from allergies so can't see and hands sore.. Catch ya tomorrow....

Hugs and luvs

Crazy days

So I know its been a little while again since I last wrote, these past few weeks just flew by.
I am still in the retail business so you can imagine what that's been like. I have a new respect for anyone in the retail business.
Right now my realestate career is pretty much been on hold.  I have to focus on making money to get from month to month. I know in a few months things will be better but all I can do is focus on here and now. I will continue to work with the same company that I am currently with and help them manage the model home for the builder and hopefully I can assist other realtors in the area with open houses and such.
And I can tell you here an now I am wiped out and could sleep for days.  The exhaustion and fatigue is indescribable at this point. The pain is increasingly worse as the more stress and the harder I work the worse it is. But I just push through cause that's what I need to do and resting when I can.
 I am trying to get more sleep and I am eating better, trying to prepare snacks and making sure I have my water with me helps out and keeps me from spending money to eat each day.
  Hubby comes home today, I am so excited yet sad, the house is not in order to what I would like for him, we are you to the chaos and clutter, where he lives alone and is used to it slightly on the OCD side. This is not me. I live out of laundry baskets most of the time. I know it would be so much easier to just put it away, I have been trying and I want to. Just to tired , maybe lazy too. So, I look to just get through another week one day at a time.
  I am excited to see what the new year will bring us, I am still sadden by the fact that my husband will NOT be coming back to Ft Hood in May like we had expected. Oh, if  you didn't know he will be going to Korea for a year this summer. Good thing is he will be home for Lacey's graduation, but will miss yet another Christmas and Anniversary. But it also kept him from deploying again which is the main reason he chose to go there. I have done this for so many years and yet this seems to get harder and not easier, maybe I am not as strong as I was or maybe I am just plain sick of being alone.  In any case what choice do I have, I am an Army wife and mother and we will make it. 

Well thats all for now, take care of You.. Lots of Love and gentle hugs my friends. God Bless

Refreshed

Wow, I can not believe it has been so long since I got on here to write. My hand have been pretty sore and so have my arms. Been working alot lately. So I never bothered to pick up the laptop at all. I was just using my phone to do a few updates here an there.
First i want to say thanks to all my friends out there, I always wonder why would I blog, who wants to read my stuff. Then as I started to feel ill I searched ay and night for information, and I soaked it all up. I felt so much better to know that I was ot Alone. There are others, I am not crazy.
So I thought if  I could reach just a few people with my random rantings, and make them feel better, then I have accomplished something.
And guess what, people ARE reading it. That's is so exciting, hope you don't notice all my typos, my brain seems to work faster then my fingers, and the Internet can handle.  And  now the batteries in the key board are going out on me. 
Well I guess I need to wrap up early then, but I wanted to tell you real quick;
Last week was a really rough week, I cried, at everything- even a Folgers commercial, and the news where that track girl crawled over the finish line for her dieing coach, anyway, I had migraine & sinus headache last Wed, slept the entire day away, next day got the kids off, and then went home and slept more, ignored phones call and all. Friday I had to work at BBW- didn't want to leave the house. I got nauseous and upset stomach bad, it was awful, tried to get up and would get dizzy and shaky.
I went anyway, my good friend was working with me and she always makes me laugh and smile.
I could have stayed home, wallowed in my self pity, my despair, but I had to look around, some of my woes are financial like everyone else lately, but I know I have to work to fix it, right?
so I worked all day Sat, Sunday I went to SS Class- felt so good, then worked long shift  and a trip to the ER (another story later)
I have been reading Proverbs each day and discussing it (via text) Great idea to have accountability, w/ out the pressure. my point is that  I woke up this am, drank my coffee, showered and dressed, actually put on make up and did my hair. Yes, I wore make up today.  And I still had spoons left the-spoon-theory
and here I am sitting at work and still going, I did take one of my Rx pills today that helps but that was later in the day.  So do you think that because I took the time to learn from God this week that I feel so much better then last week, when I thought everything and everyone hated me? I would have to say that it has everything to do with my attitude today, sure I have a wonderful party tonight for work, but last week I would not have even thought about going. Surrounding myself with people no way.

OK keyboard & mouse are really dying and my hands are cramped, gonna go get pretty for party and relax.

PS Had sweet couple come into today, praying that they are serious about building and their home sells quick.

Thanks for visiting...~Gentle Hugs~ God Bless

Decisions

Well here it is, a year later, and once again I am have come to a place in my life that I feel I need to make some changes. These past few months have not been my best, I am more tire then ever and just have a serious case of the "I dont cares" and "I dont want to's" to which has caused me to be unreliable and undependable.
That saddens me, I am a hard worker, I will gove it my all each time- but I can't do it right now. It take more then you know just to get out of bed each day, to raise my arm to brush my hair (much less shower and try to wash it) the pain can be aweful.
Now that things have changed for me I need to change my way of thinking and working. I need to find a better way of doing things to keep myself from overdoing it.
After this school year I will not be active on as many committees, already dropping 2( I will not join each and every club, I have learned that things will go on even if there is an opening on the board or not ( it will function with out me) I cant give it my all, and if its not done right am I really doing anyone any good anyway?
So now that I have finally thought things out, hubby and I have discussed all of our options and this is where we are:
1) He will be going to Korea for a year, then back to Ft Hood Spring of 2012
2) We will keep the house a little longer (provided I find a steady job)
3) I must focus on my health first and work 2nd- even if I have to put my career on hold (kinda already has been anyway)
4) Getting into my Bible Study & Daily reading is a must, I am so disconnected from God right now and I need to strengthen that relationship
5) My kids still need structure, now more then ever- this is the year WE get it right.

Directions

How well do you listen to directions?  Do you follow them to the "t" or do just push through trying to get as much done as you can and do it all but only part way?
That seems to be the case alot of times lately around my house. We barely have time to breath much less take out the trash & put a new bag in.
So how  do we fix that, how can we get back to the basics? God and family, then everything else. I understand we all work and and get distracted by everything especially kids or coworkers.
Last time I wrote I talked about scheduling and making sure that we performed out best during the day. that focus was  more for us with chronic illness or Brain Fog if you will so that we can keep working with out forgetting the task at hand. Or sentence for that matter
So getting back to the daily schedules, do you start you am off with coffee and breakfast, is that when you read your emails or your morning paper? I have tried to incorporate my bible study time then, maybe take 30 minutes before the kids are up running around and screaming they can't find their shoes. Then maybe on your lunch break take another 15 minutes or so and just Praise God, praise him for everything, then ask him for your needs as well as others. I do alot of worship in the car, I can sing as loud as I want with no one to laugh or judge. It makes my drive time go by alot faster and I am in such a better mood once I get to my next destination for I am consumed by the holy spirit.
There is a message out there for each one of us. A path to follow and directions are laid out each day, with guidance and we fail everyday trying to make our own path or doing it my own way.
HELLO, that's not working, wake up and look at everything around you. Is that where you are supposed to be? Just take time to listen and hear the directions that are being spoken to you. Sometimes we just have to keep going straightt forward until he say it time to make that turn.
I can keep going on and on ranting but that doesn't fix it, I have to start doing it.

Working in Pain

Working with (in) pain... we all do it right? Whether we are working at home cleaning or doing the mommy thing driving from here to there, pto meetings and dance class- or just at work doing what we do.
How do we do it each and every day, well for the most part we don't have a choice. you learn to do what you have to. Yes some day you cant get out of bed, don't stress about it, that makes it worse. So what do you do on those days?
I finally get it now, being organized and keeping up with things instead of putting it off til the next day is one way to keep yourself in check. Because with us tomorrow may just be one of those days. I don't want you to over do it on your good days, setting your own pace.
So maybe make up a schedule for the week, this is what I have started doing, each day will have it's own thing this can be for house work or work Monday's will be my marketing days, I will respond to all weekend emails that need follow ups and web leads.  Tuesday are touring days, we hit all the open house and see what in the area. After and it s a good day to tour my own listings to check on each one.  Wednesday will be my Whatever day- also giving ME a chance to catch up on emails and previous days stuff that may have gone unattended. Thankful Thursday- I will have a business luncheon- can be with a fellow realtor, investor, loan officer, maybe board stuff.  Write 5 thank you cards and mail out. Also taking out 1 hour to meet with a friend instead of face booking or texting them. This shows them I am grateful for them.
Fun Friday- what can be better then a laid back Friday- first thing in the am make contact with all sellers, update them on housing info. Check on buyers to see if they need anything before the weekend comes. Maybe they want to look at a few homes late Saturday, get those scheduled now, not early in the am when they are not answering their phones.
This seems pretty easy to go by, until the phone rings and you are out the door to meet with a client.
Or you are so sore in the morning you can barely grab the phone to say I am not coming in.
Knowing that its OK to wait til tomorrow if your body is tell you it need rest. By keeping it all lined up one day to the next you should be fine to rest and not worry. What do you do to make it easier?
So now that I rambled on about my daily work routine, what is yours? Can you get up at 5:30 and exercise right away, or do you drag yourself out of bed by grabbing the dresser- to the wall- to the bathroom counter? Tomorrow I will attempt to talk about morning routines and how can we (I) start one..